Discovery

for all our loves, lost too soon
by Stephanie F. Earls

you(2)

shone in the quiet, 

dark days 

a solstice storm

on the way in

and on the way out

union and void

invisible evidence

in your wake

binary stars 

(y)our vesicas

a paradox of infinity 

too far to touch

yet warm in heart

death and life hold hands

longing is (l)onl(e)y

quenched with hope

so you are written

while slipping or setting (i’m not sure which)

into distant sky

eyes and heart too spellbound

to write you sooner

in the midst of

fire and light

storm and sea

clarity and confusion

truth

once seen by naked eye

now a pulse of memory and potential

part of

every sun, every moon

i knew the last (first) time i saw you 

would be the last time i saw you

i knew i would miss you 

even before you knew you were gone

**

oh starlights, how to deliver

tender vulnerability?

how to keep it protected

as it births?

You Carry Your Magic Inside

By Stephanie F. Earls

Browse the internet, social media or certain yoga publications and you might get the impression that a mastered practice requires specific physical ability or certain clothes, beads or candles. You might think you have not gotten “there” unless you study with a revered teacher, practice hours a day or can do a challenging pose. But something yogis, especially teachers, come up against is how to show yoga without giving the impression that the show is the thing. The truth of yoga can not be shown, it must be experienced.  What we show (even this blog in words and picture) is a metaphor that attempts to hint at the truth that yoga points us to, the truth that is in us. Yoga and healing are not about the props or crystals or candles or clothes. Beautiful symbols, inspiring icons and our teachers can help us focus and enrich our surroundings or they can become crutches in the pursuit of self care and self realization. One of my intentions as a teacher is to equip students with the ability to free themselves by discerning between externals that support the journey inward and externals that distract or create dependence. I am in it (this work) to share ideas and ways to practice that have freed and empowered me. I teach to help others learn to teach (and free) themselves.

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Like an invisible turtle shell, yoga provides safe refuge from the pitfalls of life: self doubt, worry, anxiety, aggravation, illness, addiction, grief.…and like invisible wings, yoga lifts us to the joys of life: peace of mind, health in body, love in heart.  The philosophy and physicality of the practice can be used anywhere whether or not the right teacher or accessory is there, whether or not you can form a pose, because rather than showing a way out, yoga shows a way in… where the magic is.

It was a blessing that I found yoga when I did, almost two decades ago suffering from Crohn’s disease. I was too sick to make it through a class so I did my yoga at home in bits and pieces, in pjs, morning or night; in gas station bathrooms or in doctors’ offices. I did what I could, where I could, to survive moment to moment. The moments of opportunity to practice were small and there was no time to get everything right. On occasion I had my mat, or some quiet or could light a candle or play soothing music. But usually, day to day, I needed a safety net QUICK; noise all around, no time for beautiful trimmings or teachers or cute yoga outfits. I was forced by illness to strip the practice down to the essential: simple stretches, conscious breath, accessible meditation.  

If I had waited for the perfect ambiance I’d still be sick. I trained myself to heal and to access healing in the most raw and un-accessorized way possible, with pure intention and energy.  I trained myself to practice anywhere, anytime, anyway because I wanted to feel better and had agreed with myself to pursue health even if everything was not in its place, even if it didn’t look good. I was sick, it didn’t look good! Had smart phones or social media been around, snapshots of my practice would have been a real downer from the outside. But from the inside it was real and uplifting! AND it was liberating because the perfect situation was not required.  The practice as I knew it was (and is) portable. At the end of the day it was just me and my body, my pain, my comfort and eventually my healing.  I had found the internal tools and a foolproof, self sustaining way to access those tools and healing anytime so I could feel better, so I could live. The ability to tap into myself anytime/ anyway/ anywhere with or without stuff is one of the best gifts I’ve learned from practicing.

I share the tools I’ve learned and cultivated so that those who study with me will learn to create an entry into their own personal wellspring of internal source. For me it came through a health struggle, but that does not need to be the case. A simple sense of curiosity and desire to give self care is enough to enrich your path inward.  Like any path we come to with an open heart, we get to decide if we fall into its trappings or float with its wings.

So while ideally we establish a routine in practice and cultivate steadiness we hold close the understanding that the heart of the practice is with us no matter where we are and even if the routine is upended. We cultivate the care to maintain that practice even if the accessories drop away or we come up against a physical limitation. If you think you NEED a mat or a cushion or a candle to do yoga I am here to encourage you to liberate yourself. If you feel your practice won't be just right without your favorite spot in the room or with your preferred teacher or at the right time of day, I encourage you to do it anyway and liberate your practice. If it creates beauty and love to wear your favorite mala beads so be it, but on the day you forget them at home, rest in the knowingness that you can harness your meditation and your healing even without them. The love and the routine that is symbolized by your accessories floats with you like magic. It is your eternal and internal light and authenticity.  Empower yourself to lighten up. Return, repeat, refine and if you want to really master your practice remember it’s not about being able to stand on one hand or put your leg behind your head. It is not about looking perfect in the right yoga pants.  Instead, welcome the chances to shed the extra. Rather than waiting for that class at the end of the day, fold forward in your chair, belly on thighs, let your head hang and feel stress flow off your body. Stand up and reach for the sky when you feel confined. Stand your ground when you’re up and rest easy when you’re down. It’s not rocket science. It’s common sense magic. It is available to you anytime, anywhere.  All that matters is the fact that you can pull your practice from inside. All that matters is that little by little you practice stepping into your independence. Draw upon what you have learned or read or practiced with teachers and prioritize the voice within. Listen to your body and give it care. This is your healing path. This is your personal journey. You carry your magic inside you.

If you are reading this blog upon its release, there is still time to register for 8 Limbs in 8 Weeks, my 8 week course of yoga study beginning March 6th. We will explore the bones of yoga and cultivate a more nuanced sense of self exploration.  Find out more and register under the workshops tab at 

Central Mass Yoga or email me at SE.BreatheHere@gmail.com.

Tough Thoughts?  Three Techniques to Tidy the Mind

by Stephanie F. Earls

Hello friends and yogis! Last time I wrote for you I shared five simple postures (asanas) to freshen up the body. Some days a handful of stretches is all it takes to freshen up the mind too. Other days the mind over-does, obsessing about the past or anticipating the future. Whether it’s anticipatory anxieties, deafening doubts, woeful worries or all-encompassing emotions, the result is often elusive peace of mind. 

sfe 2015

Asana (physical posture) is the third of 8 limbs of yoga.  We use each of the 8 limbs in conjunction with the others to cultivate integrated body-mind-spirit. Physical movements prepare the body for meditation or Dhyana, the 7th limb.  So, what happens if the body feels ready to sit still but the mind is restless? This is where exercising concentration, Dharana, the 6th limb, comes in handy.  There are many techniques. Here are three simple and effective approaches to focusing the mind, quieting intrusive thoughts. Intrusive thoughts are any thoughts that feel overwhelming or distracting. 

1. Breath Awareness

Sometimes easier said than done breath awareness is almost too easy.   Step 1. Become aware of your breath. Step 2. Repeat step 1.

What is it to be aware of your breath?  Awareness in this case is an open canvas. Watch, listen, feel, sense the breath move in and out of the body.  It does not matter if the breath is quick or slow, deep or shallow, loud or soft. Simply notice how it feels. Can you notice the sensation of air at the tip of the nose?  Is there sound to the breath?  Where does the body move and where is it still as the breath comes and goes? Which parts of you get bigger with inhalation? Which parts get smaller with exhalation? You do not have to change anything. Follow the inhale all the way in and the exhale all the way out. Be curious. The breath is your life force and being present to watch it as it is, is the doorway to unconditional acceptance of yourself as you are. Practicing self acceptance will quiet the mind. 

We begin each yoga practice with breath awareness because attention on the breath links awareness to the present moment. Breath awareness works because we can not breathe yesterday and we can not breathe tomorrow. We only breathe here, now. Watching the breath is watching the present moment. The mind on the present will shed its worries of what was, anticipations of what will be and turn to what is now. 

This practice is enough. However if the  mind is stubborn, reinforce awareness of the breath using mantra to build concentration…

2. Mindful Breathing

Breath centered mantra is a variation on breath awareness. Mantra is loosely defined as a repeated word or phrase. Almost anything can be a mantra. In yoga, sanskrit words or sounds are often used this way. This particular mantra uses English words and comes from the writings of delightful Buddhist monk Thich Nhat Hanh. It simply and powerfully reinforces the link between the mind (awareness) and breath (life force/body) with phrases repeated silently. 

It is easy. While you breathe, say to yourself:

Breathing in: “I know I am breathing in.”

Breathing out: “I know I am breathing out.”

As the breath slows and the mind quiets you can adjust the mantra, shortening it to “breathing in, breathing out” or eventually pared-down to “in,” “out”. 

That’s all there is to it. Sounds easy right? What is fun and funny about this practice is that the mind is spry and can be tricky. You might find yourself saying the mantra but breathing out of sync with the phrase. See if you can stay present to bring the two together. 

In time this practice will feel natural. Make it your own. Vary the phrase to steer your mind and capture what you want to cultivate as you breathe in and out. 

My favorite variation and one I teach often is

Breathing in: “I arrive in my body.”

Breathing out: “I am home.”

Feel these words. They are magic. They focus the mind on the breath and affirm a settling into the body.  Pure, powerful.

Breathing in: “I arrive in my body.”

Breathing out: “I am home.” 

As Thich Nhat Hanh says, Your body is your first home. This life affirming mantra creates comfort for body, mind and spirit. 

Breath centered mantra can be done for 3 or 30 or 300 minutes on your mat, or while brushing your teeth, or in your car when you get stressed about the slow poke in front of you. Practice when your body winces about a long hold in a pose or cramps up while you run. Practice while healing an ailment - long or short term - including obsessive thoughts. Practice in seated meditation. This technique is easy, nourishing, and an opportunity to replace intrusive thoughts with presence and affirmation. 

3. The Sitali Breath

The Sitali breath is one of many breath exercises (Pranayama, the 4th limb) in yoga. Pranayama moves energy in the body, focuses the mind and integrates the body-mind connection. Each pranayama has a different effect. Sitali is a cooling breath, useful for  simmering hot thoughts as well as hot flashes.  It quiets the mind because it organizes attention around a pattern of breathing  that passes the inhale over the shaped, still tongue. There are theories that the movement of the mind is linked to movement of the tongue (there is certainly a connection there with talking) and perhaps by stilling the tongue there is a correlation and stilling of the mind. 

There are several benefits of this breathing exercise. For today’s purpose we are considering the effects of Sitali in cooling hot, frenetic thoughts (anger, anxiety, over-excitement, etc). 

To begin, curl the edges of the tongue up, forming a roll and reach the tongue just slightly forward of the teeth (between the lips). If the tongue does not roll, tuck the tip of the tongue behind the top teeth, exposing the back of the tongue, or touch the front teeth together, leave the lips gently open (technically Sitkari breath). Once you’ve set your mouth in place draw the breath in through the mouth. The air will feel cool through the rolled tongue (as if drinking through a straw) or as it hits the back of the tongue or passes through the teeth. Regardless of the variation, the tongue will be still. Upon full on inhalation, close the mouth and breathe out through the nose. Try a minute or two and pause to feel the effects, letting the natural breath return in and out through the nose. If the mind remains wired, re-engage Sitali breath. 

The practice of Sitali quiets anxieties and emotions that create a heated mind. It will cool the physical body so can be a great help during hot spells of weather or hot flashes due to hormonal shifts or illness.  Heading into fall this practice might not feel appropriate if the weather is raw but if you find yourself struggling with heated thoughts (or body) give it a try. 

Create your Calm

sfe2016

Remember, thinking is not a problem in and of itself. Intrusive thoughts that overwhelm or distract us and compromise our peace of mind are what we work to settle. Use these techniques in conjunction with physical practice (asana), seated meditation or let’s be real, anytime/anywhere you notice your thoughts running away with your peace of mind and heightening your nerves. Most of our life is practice off the mat and these portable techniques are tools to organize at any moment when thoughts become intrusive. They create order out chaos.  Give these simple techniques a try. Continue painting your practice, create your calm. Remember that you are your own best teacher and employ these techniques or leave them by the wayside as you figure out what helps you tidy the mind. 

Five Minutes? Five Foundational Poses to Freshen Up 

by Stephanie F. Earls

Child’s Pose Variation

Years ago as a new teacher I heard an interview with composer Stephen Sondheim. When asked about art he said, “Art in itself, is an attempt to bring order out of chaos.”

This captured something I feel about yoga. Yoga is art to me: a combination of boundaries and freedom that facilitates creativity. It is a framework that we can use to cultivate safe haven when life (interiorly and exteriorly) feels chaotic or uncertain. Yoga doesn’t hold false promises. It simply leaves itself for us, as if on our doorstep like a package, available to be unwrapped and explored, with curiosity. The deeper I delve into the practice the more I realize that the most simple things can be the most enlightening; the more I trust that yoga is reprieve. Yoga has taught me that our spirit is the source of our safety and our essence is ease.

In a past post Healing is Real I explained how my own healing and comfort were cultivated day to day with sometimes the smallest efforts. In that light and with a more practical edge, here I share five staples of my home practice to spark your own or to serve as a blueprint to help you feel stronger and more spacious in your body if even just for five minutes. No mat required! All you need is your body and your presence of mind. Take it slow and hold each pose or link them together for a simple, effective flow. Come to class to learn nuance and polish your form. At home keep it simple, listen to your intuition and do what feels good. Notice your breath.

Symmetrical Stretch

1. Symmetrical Stretch can be done standing up or laying down. Are you just waking up? Try it in your bed. Have you been stuck at a desk? Stand up and reach for the sky. This pose is so easy and intuitive you don’t need a yoga teacher to “get it”. Reach your arms up over head and stretch your legs forward. If you are standing up, push your feet down and energetically apart against the ground or rise to tip toes. If you are laying, point your toes and then flex your feet. Which way makes you feel better? Vary the stretch in the arms by hooking the thumbs and try to reach your arms apart, or interlace the fingers and flip the palms…or my favorite, open your body like letter X. Try swaying a little to the right and left. Think of this as a wake up stretch. What does your breath do?

Child’s Pose

2. Child’s pose/Balasana and Knees to Chest are two poses but one in the same depending on how you look at it. One might be easier than the other if you have tender knees or hips. If you are on your back bring knees to chest, hold the knees with your hands or reach for your feet. Knees can be together or apart, close to the body or over the hips. Place your legs so that your back feels comfortable or stretch the back by lifting your upper body off the floor. For a gentler version support your head with a blanket and rock your head side to side to release your neck. Knees to chest eases a tired back. If your hips and knees are healthy take the same shape facing the ground in Child’s pose/Balasana. Start on hands and knees and sit back as if you are putting your hips on your heels. Let the back round. Knees can be together (to support the low back) or apart (to give more room for the body and breath). Rest your head on the floor or your hands. Practicing child’s pose quiets the mind and calms the nervous system. The energy of this pose is a bit like a shell for a turtle, protective and quiet.

Reclined Twist

3. Reclined Easy Twist. Twists feel great and this one is easy. Lay on your back and bring your knees toward your chest and then drop both knees to one side. Open your arms out to the sides like letter T or put one hand on your belly or ribs to get tactile feedback about the rhythm of your breath. Turn your head in the direction that feels easy. Stretch through it or just rest and wait and let the twist do the work for you. Switch sides. This pose makes room for deeper breaths because it opens up lung space in the chest, ribs, collarbones and back. It also encourages healthy digestion.

Downward Facing Dog

4. Downward Facing Dog/Adho Mukha Shvanasana is a stretch and strengthener for the whole body. It looks like an upside-down V. Start from hands and knees: tuck your toes and push into your hands so that your hips come up into the air. Imagine stretching your spine as your hips lift up and your arms energetically push forward. Keep the knees bent if you need and reach through your heels. I remember one friend and teacher used to say “forget this is called down dog and just think of it as holding yourself up on your hands and feet with your butt in the air.” I loved that because it freed me up to figure out the most efficient way to hold myself in the pose and made it a little more fun. There are many ways to refine this posture and they are important and worthwhile. Refine if that feels good or let that be your motivation to come to class. Sometimes letting go of the picky details and moving freely in ways to feel comfortable (stable, spacious and strong) does the trick at home. Trust your intuition.

5. Low Lunge/Anjaneyasana is one of my favorite poses for its ability to strengthen, ground, tone and stretch the body. It encourages space in the hips, length in the torso and lift in the heart. It is invigorating. From Downward Dog or from hands and knees, step one foot between your hands so that the knee is over the ankle. Set the back knee down and slide it a bit behind the back hip to feel a slight stretch at the front of the hip. Press the top of your back foot into the ground and press down and energetically forward with your front foot so that the torso lifts up off the front thigh. Extend this pose into your arms by reaching toward the sky. Lift your gaze, lift your intention. Try little movements or a deep breath to cultivate ease while you work. Switch legs and repeat.

These poses get the job done whether you need to make space in your body, calm your nerves, or energize yourself. Practice these poses simply, combine elements or embellish them with your personal touch, even if for five minutes. When you do, see how moving your body and paying attention to yourself refocuses you. Use your body to freshen your mind and heart. Create your art. Bring order out of chaos.

If you have questions or want to practice with me I am available for private instruction 

and Public classes at Central Mass Yoga and Wellness:

Monday 930am Yin Yoga
Tuesday 530pm Hatha 1
Wednesday 930am Hatha 2/3

our old wounds

by Stephanie F. Earls

i notice in my own small, individual experience of healing my wounds (emotional, physical, mental, spiritual) that when i feel safe enough to open up and allow my vulnerability to preside, i feel simultaneously empowered and fragile. 

in my vulnerability there is a peace and solace that brings clarity. paradoxically it is also when my fears, anxieties and old wounds come roaring. we've seen this all too often on a collective scale when into our beautiful, vulnerable moments (marathons, churches, creative institutions, schools, parks, playgrounds, sidewalks) our old wounds (hatred, anger, anxiety, addiction, fear) roar. 

in my internal experience two things happen. in reaction to the roars of my personal wounds i feel edged to close myself off and run away. sometimes i wonder if it's easier to leave things as they are. but knowing better and when i feel brave, in response, i interpret the eruption of fears and old wounds as a plea from deep within my being...for me to see them (that part of myself) and acknowledge them: their(my) hurt, their (my)fragmentation, their (my)pain. 

my fragmented pieces are as much a part of me as my more whole-feeling parts. 

our societal wounds are as much a part of our human being as our celebration.

in empowered moments when i respond instead of react, there is a sense, however slight, of healing my wounds and fragments. there is a sense of disarming the tender, angry, scared, anxious, broken-feeling parts of myself.  it can be a grueling process that happens push-pull style within my heart and head and soul. by the grace of love in my life i am supported by strong, brave souls with-in (me) and around (all of you) who are willing to step up and love me and see me through the fragments so that i can continue to evolve. 

our human body is heartbreakingly wiggling through it's (our) own evolution in this tug-o-war between opening our hearts and running to hide (or scream or cry or say what the hell??) as our collective fears and hurts roar. we need to be our culture's strong, brave souls, willing to see ourselves through the healing as our collective human body/mind/spirit heals.  

the collective wounds we carry sometimes quell, but when they roar it is tragedy in (the organism of) our present society. it is scary, sad, maddening. in our fear, in reaction, we think it's a choice between "this" (some might say light) or "that" (some might say dark) but in truth our fragmented parts (hatred, hurt, fear, anger) will keep showing themselves -personified- so we can not deny their presence, so we can respond until they are seen and healed, loved, disarmed. and in our looking and seeing, talking and asking, listening and hearing, admitting and acknowledging, dare i say embracing, we give ourselves and our whole self (human body) the chance, however small, to mend. we move in our evolution so we can be truly whole. 

so in all our vulnerable moments as these old wounds come to the surface and roar let's stop. i'm saying this as much to myself in a singular way as i am to our whole self in our multiplicity. let's be better and more kind in our dialogue and actions, both internally and in our collective consciousness. let's stop. as uncomfortable as it might make us, let's turn toward and look into the hurt of old wounds,  in all the ways they make themselves known, and bring them our love. 

it's tough. but not tougher than us. we have to keep the faith that between the light of clear boundaries and open hearts our fears will soften and dissipate. with our continued care and attention and willingness we can evolve into a more whole, healed being (individual and collective).  we must, for the sake of our whole human body, for the sake of our gorgeous earth, for the sake of everyone who is willing to make themselves vulnerable as they run a race or pray in peace or study in a classroom or walk in a park...be willing to look at the wounds of our culture, open to them, and shine our light.

healing is real

by Stephanie Earls

I'm sometimes asked why I teach yoga/what brought me to the practice. While there are a million reasons - and just one - all at the same time, what is important to say is that I am compelled to share the practice and empower others because as I stand present in my life, whether in a class or in my kitchen, I am living proof that healing is real. This is a miracle. 

For ten years I suffered through life with Crohn's Disease; an incapacitating, inflammatory bowel disease which makes living hard. Life with disease/dis-ease of any sort is ridden with anxiety, pain (physical and emotional), distress and exhaustion.  It can be difficult to carry out even the most basic human functions like eating, drinking and sleeping. There are complications of disease which in my case included incessant diarrhea, kidney stones, bladder infections, chronic indigestion and arthritis (to name some). My whole body hurt. Daily. I felt weak. My mind was discouraged. It felt hard to find space to breathe, let alone eat well or sleep well or regenerate. Despite a brave face, I wanted OUT of my body most moments of most days for ten years. There was said to be "no cure".

During those years I obsessively searched for tools to cope with living with disease. Some brought temporary reprieve while others felt like flimsy band-aids that I bled through in seconds. Five years into my diagnosis I was told that by ten years later I would not have a colon.

That sobering thought was unacceptable to me and I decided to think something different so that I could live something different. Then, rather than seeking out tools to cope, I sought out tools to heal.  (I came to know that the most powerful tool to heal is in us.) With this new vision to heal, a shift happened. 

I became aware that my most comforting reprieve came while practicing yoga. I practiced at home. It was not fancy or flashy. I didn't wear sexy yoga clothes. I was on my family room floor usually in pjs while my babies slept or coo-ed (IF they slept or coo-ed). I practiced slowly and gently for 5 minutes or 25 minutes. 

When I practiced, the overwhelming moments of wishing to get out of my body began to quiet.  Yoga gave me the chance to find space and comfort in myself.  This worked better than any "medicine" to help me be at ease.  Yoga met me where I was; it came to me and held me tenderly while my body was weak, tired and sore. It was still waiting for me if I had to get up out of a pose to go to the bathroom or feed my babies. It was unconditional love.

This encouraged and inspired me to practice more. With each visit to the practice I filled a reservoir of nourishment. I fortified my innate faith in the body's ability to mend and heal and regenerate so that years later when even advanced medicines (and I was on GOBS of meds) failed to bring me the slightest relief, something in me which was nurtured by the practice piped up and said "you can heal".  I connected to my intuitive and unwavering knowingness that I could stop chasing short term fixes and heal for real.

So I committed myself to the vision to heal. And I did.

The going was slow.  This gave me time to realize that my body, in all its aches and fighting itself, was letting me know it needed something I was not giving it: my presence. Which is love.  I delved deeper into yoga, all its facets, using the body to become aware and training the mind and breath to support the body. Navigating that path was equal parts calm and chaos. It sometimes felt cyclical. I sometimes felt cynical. Yet the steady friend/compassionate mother that yoga is completely changed my relationship to myself. It gave me a place to be still and safe and create space. It gave me a chance when things felt as if they were whirring around in the cycle, to sit still and let the cycle swirl without me putting myself into the tizzy with it. 

As I created space, I could breathe and as I breathed, life regenerated itself in every cell in my body.  As my cells regenerated, disease dissolved and so did the parts of my life that did not support my health. The path was slow and windy but my vision was steady on healing. I reaffirmed my intentions daily, regardless of how things looked in the meantime. I chose to see everything as part of the healing: every "relapse" every cramp, every doubt, every discomfort.

I used every day to reaffirm my commitment to heal and not settle for anything less that the best.

From there it became about repetition: making friends with my body, my mind, and my quest for health and trusting that everything that happened once I had committed to heal was for my life. This was a challenge because as I healed, anything that was not life affirming dropped away. Anything unsupportive of health, faded. This meant enduring serious life changes on all fronts: physical, mental, emotional. Relationships that did not bring me to life went away. Thoughts that hurt were broken down and corrected. Emotions flared until I could embrace rather than numb or ignore them. This was a true test of being my own best friend. Yoga helped keep me steady through it all and functioned as scaffolding while I laid a foundation - for life - on health, and built myself anew. 

With my course set and intention to heal, I left the details up to the universe/god/light/love, to mystery...I decided to trust. I decided to keep the faith. I trusted that my sense of healing was true and that my body knew how to do its work without me thinking so much about the how.  I stopped letting my mind try to think it was the boss and put my faith in the power of my intuition and my body's innate ability to be life. I reestablished the reality that life and love always prevail.

My life changed. The pain stopped. Trips to the bathroom became healthy, all of my vital organs balanced out and every symptom that I ever had over the years prior ceased. I returned to being able to take long plane rides and short trips to get ice cream. I weaned off meds. Completely.

Healing has been simultaneously cautious and crazy, empowering and enigmatic. Without a doubt, beautiful. With clear vision, like magic, a network of support formed in my life that promoted my health in all ways. I came back to a fully alive version of me.

I got my life back.

And best of all, the current that healed and guided me to trust life carried me to share the tools that I have learned. And this is why I teach yoga. Regardless of what my mind says, from the inside I am compelled to share the practice that helps us be better for everything in life. I teach because my life depends upon it and so does yours. The principles and practice that connected me to healing are universally effective whether our needs are emotional, mental, physical or spiritual. This practice works in all ways to make life better whether we "just" want to live a happy life (YES!) or if we need deep healing. Yoga practice, it's philosophy and physicality, empowers us to heal and mend all wounds and to establish healthy patterns so that we can live fully alive. It strengthens our intuition and yokes us directly to the source of life that is US so that we live with our lights on...we enlighten ourselves in the most grounded sense of the word. And then life (love, health, joy, compassion) becomes exponential. Then, collectively, we rise up. 

our marathon; our manifesto

by Stephanie F. Earls 

We woke up on Marathon Monday with trust: in a beautiful day, in an amazing event and in our community.  We woke with trust in the race, the human race. And in some twisted turn of events on this day of celebration, we mourned. On this day of anticipated elation, we grieved loss. This happy day had too much sadness. These are the moments in life that leave us perplexed. How can such intense love, joy, fulfillment of dreams and culmination of hard work, be juxtaposed with fear, chaos, disorientation and hijacked goals? 

We may not have each run a marathon road race, but each of us has run a marathon of our own. We are still running. We know how it feels to reach some goals and have others feel unattainable. We have set our intentions. We've started and plan to finish. We have healed dis-ease. We have mended addiction. We have endured the loss of loved ones to death or aborted relationships. We have grieved the loss of dreams and expectations. We have made wishes. There have been times when our external finish lines (our hopes) disappeared. There have been times when we crossed those lines, reached our goal, and the thrill was thwarted by something out of our control.  There have been times when distraction has tried to sway our attention. There are times we are inspired. There are times we are afraid. Sometimes our goal looks different than it did while training, than it did when the race began. Than we ever imagined.  And yet, undeniably, we are here. This is our path. We are on it. The question is really, regardless of the outcome, how will we take each step? This is life. 

We will trust life.

If it happens as we live and claim our dreams, that darkness pops up,  we will stay strong.  We will transform the challenge of distraction and clarify our intentions. We will not be defeated by delay. We will refocus and keep our sights on what is at the heart of our matter.

We're all in it now. Just like each runner today, we each have our own personal marathon and collectively something bigger which includes those who cheer us on and those who divert our attention or rob us of something we hope for.  As we marathon to let our spirit through, to let light and hope prevail, it's not just the runners and spectators in Boston today. It's all of us. The world. We're in this race where spirit, strength and light are taking the lead. We are shining and lifting each other up. Darkness is exerting its

Copley Square Sky early April 2013: sfe

last attempts, not just to distract us but to encourage us. With each dark distraction we are asked on some level to recommit and refocus our intention. We are also asked to shine our light and heal the dark. What wins in this human race? There is power in numbers and most of us, lit up, are strong enough to shed our light on the dark and help it heal.  So here's what we do. Not despite darkness, but to transform it: 

We make wishes. We set intentions.  We hope.  

We set our wishes free so that they can manifest. We believe wishes come true. We trust that life, as it unfolds, in all it's clarity and confusion, will yield the answers to our questions, the fulfillment of wishes, the realization of our intentions. Even if it doesn't make sense right now. Especially if it doesn't make sense right now. We trust that things unfold in the best time and in the best way, for our best. We trust that life and love prevail. We love. We love ourselves, our light and our dark. We love all that nourishes us and we love all that hurts (in ourselves and others) so that the hurt heals.  We love the dark and bring it our light. We keep renewing our commitment to ourselves, our life, our hopes. We keep lifting our intention.

This is faith. We keep the faith.

Anything that is truly ours can not be taken away.  By anything. 

As much as 'our wishes come true' rest at that apparent finish line, they also rest deep inside of us. They rest in each and every step along the path. They rest in our resolve to wake up each day and live because we are alive.  They rest in our resolve to keep on wishing. They rest in our ability to reclaim the light when darkness threatens to take it over. Our 'wishes come true' rest in opening our hearts and sharing our strength to nourish those who feel defeated. Our 'wishes come true' rest in opening our hearts to receive the help we need. Our 'wishes come true' rest in looking at all the ways we triumph and keeping our sights on those triumphs (big and small) rather than on distractions (big and small). Our 'wishes come true' rest in the spirit of marathon (LIFE), realizing it goes on.  Our 'wishes come true' rest in the determination of a WORLD of people who despite it all, and in light of it all, wake up and trust.