Engage

by Stephanie F. Earls

One of the things I do to stay well is talk therapy. Arriving for an appointment is as therapeutic as the talk itself.

A visit begins when you pull alongside the oversized Victorian house on a cramped street. You have to take big steps up onto the porch and read the sign to remind yourself to use the door on the left.  You pull open the screen door and next to a plastic button there is a sign that says "ring bell and then enter".   Once you ring the bell your hand falls to the knob, so humungous it expands your palm and requires a long, slow turn.  As the latch releases, the weight and height of the oversized door become more apparent. It opens slow and smooth with a long creek and once inside, the door and another sign require you to turn the knob and push the door shut. Now between two doors, one just shut, the next not yet open you must again turn a big knob and enter the house through this inner door with the same deliberate movements, intentional knob turning and door shutting. There is a feeling that you are entering another world altogether sometimes. The house, it's space, is of another time; dark wood, old windows, high ceilings and these doors the size of giants.

I have been going there for two years and am still in awe at how the mere act of entering this house demands you be in the present moment. It requires you engage in the here and now, just to get IN, fittingly so since it's a path to healing,  and how can we heal or grow if we can not be here now. This house has a magic about it that gently commands your body to be here so much that your mind has no choice but to join. 

This same healing aspect, being in your present moment, is what I love about yoga, union: bringing together mind, body and spirit. It is what helps us to heal, engaging ourselves on the physical level and becoming aware of what our bodies are doing; how and why. Becoming conscious of ourselves is the path to healing. Whether on our mat or at our job, with friends or cleaning the house, we have the choice to go through the motions or truly engage.  There may be days when being present is a challenge and showing up is the best we can do. Do it. There may be days when being present is so natural that we break through our blocks. Celebrate it. There may be days when all we have are more questions and confusion. Accept it. 

There's no "winning" yoga, same goes for life (there might be a famous guy out there who disagrees ;) and our job is just to show up, turn the knob and open the door. Maybe we feel relief, maybe we don't,  but if we are here and pay attention then at least we know how we feel and can be our own best friend.  We will have been present, the place where the eternal, the infinite, dwells. It is the place where the doors, no matter how big, begin to open with our deliberate intention, showing us our path. 

Connect

by Stephanie F. Earls

A few days ago I took my kids to the bookstore. My oldest son brought along a personal computer game because he wanted to see if he could connect via wifi to other people playing the game he was playing. As we walked around the store  he watched the little machine, taking note of how many bars he had...2, now 3, now 2, now 1.  We made our way into the back of the store and while I was looking at something I heard his little voice saying, "connect, connect, connect", almost begging for his game to find other players.

It made me laugh a little because I have had moments like that where my technology lapses...cable modem freezes up or my cell phone does not get service and I am trying to connect.

It can be frustrating, we want to reach out and find eachother....blogs, facebook, telephone, emails. But, if electricity goes out or nothing's coming through, we feel alone. We sit there saying, "connect, connect, connect".

At our core, as much as we value our individuality, we also crave the connection to others, to community and most of all, to ourselves. We long for feeling connected, in touch, alive.

So how do we do it? You can be in a room of 100 people and feel totally alone.  You can be sitting next to your best friend and feel alone. You can have your internet connection working perfectly: twitter, facebook, email functioning but no one to talk to. Isolated. So what is it we are truly after? Is it a working wifi connection or a working connection to ourselves?

Maybe in the moments when technology bogs up or phones don't ring is our chance, a little space to listen to ourselves...our heart, our soul, our bodies. Yoga does this for me, for you it could be taking a nap or running a few miles or creating art.  It is the time we turn inside and just listen. Maybe what we hear sounds sweet, maybe bitter. It does not really matter. What matters is the listening.  In listening we connect.  We connect to ourselves, our own inner voice, guidance, wisdom. We connect to our knowingness.  It's not about whether it's good or bad, light or dark, happy or sad...it's about that we pay attention and answer our spirit's call to connect.  Just like us, our spirit is hanging out saying "connect, connect, connect" and all we need to do is put up a little signal saying, "I'm here".  Then as we listen, we learn, we know better. When we know better we offer a more pure version of ourselves in everything we do. It's not whether we behave or get in trouble. It's not whether we feel tired or invigorated. It's not whether we are happy or totally pissed.  It's about just taking the time to listen and be here, to be our own best friend, to be our connection. And through that connection comes the life, the inspiration and the strength to guide us to and through every other connection we make.

Listen to your spirit. Grant it's wish. Connect, connect, connect.